On a stormy day when the rain was falling there was a boat in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean. The wind was so powerful it could knock out a person. As the wind built up the engine started to cut out, everyone was panicking as the boat rocked. Nearby lightning struck the boat, it rocked side to side, as the rain fell all the people on board thought they would never get out alive. The captain shouted, "if you want to survive then jump.” Thankfully everyone survived but the shipwrecked boat was a scary reminder of what might have been.
Hi Caitlin. I am glad everyone survived! You described the events very well using grammatically correct sentences and interesting vocabulary, well done. Remember that the first word within inverted commas (or speech marks) is always spelt with a capital letter.
ReplyDeleteWell done for entering this week's 100 word challenge.
Keep up the excellent effort :-)
Mrs Johnson, Team 100WC
Northampton, England
Hi Caitlin. You have built up a lot of suspense with your description of the setting - well done. You have used some good vocabulary - powerful, stormy, panicking, survive. I’m pleased that everyone on the boat was OK in the end. Well done for using a couple of commas to separate the some of the clauses; try to spot where some more of them could have gone.
ReplyDeleteWell done for entering this week’s 100 word challenge.
Miss Willing (Team 100WC)
Huntingdon, England