One warm sunny morning I ZOOMED down stairs. I quirkily
slurped my breakfast up, grabbed the shiny gold key, opened the door, jumped on
to my shiny red scooter and scooted off to the haunted mansion down Freak
Street. I carefully inserted the golden key into the rusty old key hole. I
opened the door carefully then it screeched open and I could see the insides of
the ancient house which once a quirky 17th century family used to
live in. I saw a ghost. It freakishly screamed at me then erratically flew at me,
I screamed running in circles and then the noise stopped!
There's a sense of playfulness, adventure and a real pace to your 100WC Jake. You've achieved this by using a wide range of rich and highly descriptive vocabulary - great verbs, adverbs and adjectives. Well done.
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