As I packed my kit bag, going to war was becoming real. Just an ordinary boy from an ordinary family from an ordinary street. As I looked up through the window I could see my sister talking to mum outside with her arm placed around her shoulder I could see that I wasn't the only one who was finding this hard but we all knew had to be done . As I packed the final things dad handed me something to take, it was a photograph so I’d remember my family are with me and I’m not in this alone.
Great job trying to capture the sadness and uncertainty going to war brings to a family Harvey. I like how you emphasised the word 'ordinary'. You are missing the word 'it' in the second last sentence. I like how you chose a photo for your character to receive from his dad and explained the significance behind this. I could easily picture this moment in my head. Well done. Mrs Miller Team 100 WC Australia
ReplyDeleteI like the way you used the prompt, and looked at someone leaving for war rather than people remembering a loss. This way, the story has some hope.
ReplyDeleteWell done. Keep it up!
Alicia, The Bahamas, Team 100