Monday 4 November 2013

Anna 100 Word Challenge #10

When I was walking along the uneven path I saw this small puddle. I asked my mum if I could jump in it and I did, but it was not shallow, it was deep. I fell upside down and all my mum could see was my grey wellies and not my body. She called the police. They came as soon as they could. When they pulled me out all that they could see were leaves stuck on my body. They rushed me to the hospital and when they called they said, “Can you speak?”
I didn't answer I was dead!!!

1 comment:

  1. Well, that is one way to end a story!
    I enjoyed reading your story until you reached the end.
    Good use of short sentences in the middle section to increase the pace and tension.
    Could you think of a better word than small to describe the puddle at the start?

    ReplyDelete