Suddenly a ginormous man with pointy yellow teeth appeared as they were being watched they assumed that he was the one that was watching him because his yellow teeth looked like descries.
They weren’t taking no for an answer. As the day began he was still stood glaring at the two people’s eyes, they began to get a little scared. "I think we should run! whispered, Sarah. The sprinted around the garden, threw bushes, around corners until the got to a fantastic hiding place. All of a sudden there was a strange voice and it was the spooky man…
Amy, I'm not sure what you meant by descries?
ReplyDeleteRemember to follow a full stop with a capital letter. You have opened speech marks but not closed them! You have put the instead of they twice.You have used threw instead of through.
Make sure you read through your work carefully to make sure it makes sense to everyone!
Amy,a scarey tale. Some of your words did not make sense to me, but the sense of danger was strong. Thanks for your entry.
ReplyDeleteAndy Knill, Team 100WC, Essex, UK